Yup, I am that Douche

Wow, what stressful week. I would much rather do a total disaster recovery on a VLDB than do this again. Last week, I announced I had taken a new job. Leaving my current position of nearly a decade. Well, I took a counter offer. When I resigned I told them I was not interested in a counter offer. I was so confident that I even announced it here before my butt was in the new seat. I took the job because it was really cool. There was not anything wrong with my current job or company. I was perfectly happy. The prospective employer contacted me on linkedin. I was not out job hunting.

My current employer respected that I wasn’t interested in a counter offer but a week and a half into my final two weeks the Manager of Database Services and Escalations resigned and they offered me that job. I thought that my decision to take the new job was tough. Well, let me tell you taking the counter offer was 10x rougher.

I weighed all of the pro’s and con’s. The only con for staying was the fact that I would be going back on my word. I don’t take that lightly but it was the best move for my family and I.

It came down to a lot of reasons but two main ones:

• We started this process talking in September. The economy had a horrible October. The outlook is grim for at least the next year. Most people expect it to get much worse before it gets better. I would much rather go through a great depression scale recession here. That may be just because I know where the company stands in the market and with me. However, I would hate to be the low man on the totem pole who is working remotely if things get really bad.
• In October, Microsoft announced their cloud computing initiative at PDC. This basically makes the MSSQL DBA obsolete. There will still be some on premise installations but it will be for legacy applications and the largest application so the MSSQL DBA market will be much smaller. That may take a few years but I am making this decision with the next decade in mind. In my new role, I will gain MySQL and Oracle experience which will allow me to diversify.

Conventional wisdom says never take a counter offer. However, I took the new job for unconventional reasons. It wasn’t about money. It wasn’t because I was unhappy. It was all geek factor. I just wanted to work on something of that scale.

I don’t think there is a totally right answer and I will always wonder “What if” but now that the smoke has cleared, I am feeling more and more that I made the best decision.

Thoughts?

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COMMENTS:

Ooo a retro douche bag.

Oh ya, and congrats on the new old job :D

posted @ Saturday, November 15, 2008 1:03 AM by TJ Downes

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If you didn't have an employment contract with either the new guy or the old guy *in hand* then you most certainly aren't a douche, nor did you go back on your word.

Your word was actually, "I'll be there to do that but because you didn't commit to me by contract where you might actually be at risk, I'm only committing to you as of this moment. Tit for tat brother"

Does that mean you should take lightly what you agreed to, no. But without anything other than an at-will employment offer, it was what it was. You willed it away sooner rather, that is all.

It's good to know you'll #1 still be local and #2 turning a little more to the dark side (Oracle).

posted @ Saturday, November 15, 2008 1:15 AM by Michael O'Neill

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You did the right thing. At the end of the day, no matter what tech you love and which tech you are loyal to, you have to look after numero uno and your family.
I have been in this situation in my life as an employee, freelance and now on the other side of the fence as a owner of two successful software businesses.

Trust me, you did the right thing.

Keep looking up and forward, not back and be positive. The rest will happen.

posted @ Saturday, November 15, 2008 5:06 AM by Simon Ashley

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Here's what I want to know: when you told MySpace you weren't coming, did Tom unfriend you?

posted @ Saturday, November 15, 2008 5:21 AM by Brent Ozar

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Tough choice you had to make, and I don't envy you in it.

But, you can be certain that you have 3 or more direct reports that are immensely happier than they were before you confirmed.

Unless you manage like a jerk. :)

See ya

posted @ Saturday, November 15, 2008 8:11 AM by Kevin3NF

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Oracle announced support for the cloud too! (Amazon Cloud).
Diversifying is always the best choice. When a business stops to work you should always have hooks to something that rules!
Oracle will rule because it's trusted, MySQL because it's free.

posted @ Saturday, November 15, 2008 8:53 AM by Ludovico Caldara

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It sounds like you made a smart decision that's best for you - so who else is to say if it's "right" or not. Your current company is probably extremely happy to retain you, so it's a win win. Well, ya pissed off Tom but he'll survive. He's got lots of friends ;)

posted @ Saturday, November 15, 2008 10:10 AM by sh3n3rd

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I told you you'd figure it out (in a reply on Twitter). You were at a real crossroads, but I believe because you put taking care of your family first, you made the right choice.

Having been in that position once before in my career, I know it's tough to feel you're going back on your word because your integrity is at stake. I'm sure the other folks will be OK. I'll bet they have many, many people who apply every day.

posted @ Saturday, November 15, 2008 10:31 AM by kb5nju

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Count it as a blessing that you've been in that crossroad. I'm sure lots of folks would love to be in your position. Regardless of your choice, your integrity remains intact. It was not a matter of integrity in the first place. It was a question of love of family. Dude, you did the right choice. This only shows that you are a TRUE human. And how lucky the people around you. They are your family, too!

posted @ Monday, November 17, 2008 4:00 PM by MarlonRibunal

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I don't see cloud computing making the DBA obsolete. While these things offer certain technical and business advantages, don't forget things like privacy, regulations and compliance. All things that I suspect will offset the biz and tech advantages for some time to come. I agree that we will have to continue to adapt. But that's what keeps things interesting.

posted @ Thursday, November 20, 2008 3:21 PM by Rob

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Comments from the following blog entry: http://sqlbatman.com/2009/03/why-are-you-surprised/

posted @ Wednesday, March 04, 2009 10:07 AM

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